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Supposedly, this remake was targeted as a fun film for a horny 17 year old boy to kick back and enjoy; a down and dirty exploitation horror flick that unabashedly panders to the wants of that particular market. I have news for the makers of this film: teenagers are not that stupid!
This cheap, groan-inducing remake is based on the 1988 film of the same name. Unlike that film, this one has not cordoned on to the fact that times have moved on, and sitting back on one’s behind and relying on cheap versions of done to death horror clichés is not going to hold anyone’s interest—not even a 17 year old boy.
It’s Halloween, and an over-confident hottie (Shannon Elizabeth) is throwing a rave at an old abandoned mansion in New Orleans. Enter lambs to the slaughter, including a sadly unhealthy and bloated looking Edward Furlong (Terminator 2) and the unfortunately trout-pouted Monica Keena (who was gorgeous without plastic surgery). When police break up the party, and, by some inexplicable coincidence, seven party goers—just the right number—are locked in the grounds for the night, the house’s history comes back to haunt them. They seven discover skeletal remains in the basement, and when the hottie is bitten by one of those skeletons, bad shit begins to happen. What follows is a night of debauched sex, violence, and a fight for survival…
There are so many lazily plotted clichés in this thing it makes one wonder if they were even trying. There are some visual attempts at creativity, but with a story a 5 year old could concoct at a scout’s campfire, it’s a wasted effort. The characters are ridiculously undeveloped; their motivations reduced to almost one line before we are subjected to the most yawn-inducing party scene that seems to take half the movie to finish, such is its monotony and pointlessness. It only highlights more the wafer-thin plot’s contrivances and shortcomings. Dumb fun is awesome; this is just stupid.
Gore is probably the best handled element in the whole production, with some truly grotesque make ups and set pieces throughout, however there is zero originality and nothing that hasn’t been done before, better, and on a higher budget.
More grotesque seems to be the filmmaker’s suggestion that a teenaged boy’s sole interest in sex is some juvenile misogynistic depictions of it that include a pointless oral sex scene on a drug dealer and then some S & M fetish laden tripe with a couple and a girl couple: wow. How about you credit them with a little more class, since most of them have done what you’re depicting already, and actually give them real characters to care for, and use sex as a positive instead of some idiotic wet dream only a retarded teenaged caveman might allure to? Yes a teenaged boy likes some T & A and some fun death scenes, and it is fun to set one’s brain in neutral, kick back, and watch some carnage, but they’re not stupid and this film treats its audience like they are and any old thing will do.
This tripe is a waste of its talent, a waste of money, and a waste of your time.
MPAA Rating: 
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